The thing is…some young people will try on straight edge like a jean jacket that fits a little small and is covered in patches for bands they don’t actually like. For some, straight edge becomes the long underwear, a foundation that keeps them warm and underlies everything else they wear
“You’ll have to get a bottle around that in a few years,” they laughed.
“Huh?”
“When you turn 21 and start drinking, you’ll have to get a bottle tattooed around that.”
I had just gotten three x’s tattooed on my back. I started calling myself straight edge at 16, I got the idea to get a tattoo at 19. I was less than pleased that my commitment was being treated as a joke, a phase that I would grow out of, instead of being recognized for the conviction and belief in my own choices that I had already made.
As an adult now, inching closer to 40, I still remember all the jokes and eye rolls from older people. I remember that ticking clock to when I would decide to “sell out” too. I carried that frustration with me, could people please just take me seriously? I wonder how different I would have felt if the others around me simply said, “I can’t wait to see where you go with this” instead of laughing me off.
Understanding Teenage Choices: Navigating Peer Pressure and Self-Discovery
I get it, how can a teenager (with a still developing brain) really know that they don’t want to partake in the culture of substances when they can’t even get into a bar? How can they possibly even know what they want?
The thing is…some young people will try on straight edge like a jean jacket that fits a little small and is covered in patches for bands they don’t actually like. For some, straight edge becomes the long underwear, a foundation that keeps them warm and underlies everything else they wear.
Supporting the Path: Building a Strong Community
We have no control in the community on what someone decides to do, but we can always support those people trying to stay on the path.
We can be the voice that encourages or we can be the voice that causes a younger person to look down and think about taking off the jacket. We can be the adult that laughs at them and tells them they’ll grow out of it, because clearly they aren’t as strong as we are. Or we can take them seriously, we can be the adults that recognize the choices they’re making are positive and encourage them along the way.
Fostering Positive Choices: Empowering the Youth
What are we doing to help young people choose “for life” and what are we doing to push them out?
18 years later and I still don’t have a bottle tattooed around my X’s, I still remember my naysayers and that has fueled me to always support the youth.
1 Comment
When I was younger, my brothers friends made it sound like being straightedge was like being in a cult, so I slapped the “above the influence” label on it instead and made it more palatable for my peers. When I was 18, I got the ATI symbol (circle with the arrow pointing up in it) over my heart. All my friends made the comment that when I stopped being above the influence, I’d be able to put the dates that I was sober in the circle (ex: 1995-20??). They only approved of my tattoo idea since it could easily be altered when I decided to “change my mind”.
I think being able to change your mind with new information is a beautiful thing, means you are always willing to learn. But man, sometimes you just need someone to believe in you the way you believe in yourself.
Support people making life choices. Support them if they fail. Support them in they succeed. Just support people.